I’m NOT Gay: Finding Clarity: Navigating Misunderstood Feelings with Moriel Health Center
Throughout my teenage years and early adulthood, I grappled with a profound sense of identity confusion. I believed for a long time that I was gay. The feelings I experienced seemed to confirm this belief, and so I started on a journey of self-acceptance, seeking understanding and support from my peers and community. But life, as it so often does, threw me a curveball.
The feelings I associated with being gay weren't rooted in my true sexuality but rather a complex web of past traumas I hadn't fully addressed. It's a confusing sentiment to describe. While I experienced genuine affection and attraction to those of the same gender, deeper introspection made me realize these emotions stemmed from past experiences and traumas, not an authentic romantic or sexual attraction.
Feeling lost and more confused than ever, I sought help, and that led me to the Moriel Health Center.
At Moriel, there was no presumption or bias. The therapists didn't approach me with predefined conclusions. Instead, they provided a safe space to unpack my feelings, helping me dissect the layers of past traumas and their implications on my present.
Through intensive therapy, I started recognizing patterns. I had formed exceptionally close emotional bonds with those of the same gender as a coping mechanism for past emotional wounds. These bonds, while genuine and deep, were not rooted in romantic attraction. Understanding this was both enlightening and, in some ways, devastating. I felt like I was back at square one, trying to figure out who I was all over again.
Yet, the guidance and support I received at Moriel were unparalleled. They assisted me in navigating these revelations, ensuring that I processed my feelings healthily. They equipped me with tools to address past traumas, which had blurred the lines of my identity for so long.
Today, I identify as straight. But more importantly, I've learned the complexities of human emotions and how past experiences can profoundly impact our present perceptions. My journey was neither simple nor linear, but it was essential for my personal growth and understanding.
To anyone wrestling with their identity or feelings, know this: It's okay to seek clarity. It's okay to change and evolve as you understand yourself better. And places like Moriel Health Center exist to support you, offering guidance and empathy, no matter where your journey takes you. Always remember, it's your journey, your truth, and you deserve to live it authentically.
